The real ME - the image of me

Madam, I have a story.

Go on.

All my life I have tried to be something I am not.
What I was, was not acceptable. How did I come to believe it was not acceptable ? Well it was not acceptable to the way things were organized in the world, and my feeling and ways of behaving had to be pruned to fit the world, the civilization, the social world I had been born into.

That is normal. Everyone is pruned, and everyone feels they are not acceptable.

Part of the path ?

Yes.

Does it have to be this way ?

I don't know but it has been for you.

I can feel the real ME deep down. And there is a tension between the real ME and the me I pretend I am, the me I try to make myself into. The pain in my body, the illnesses, are the result of that tension. I can blame society and outside factors, but really it is all within me. Between me and ME. Everything else is just an excuse. I feel tension now, but I know, it is my deeper self talking to me.
I'm learning how to listen to that language.

You are welcome.