Wednesday, June 01, 2011

how WORRY works -

I love taking technical things apart, to see how they work.
Today I started taking something else apart: Worry.

I figured out HOW worry works. I don't know WHY people worry, or how to STOP it, but I have satisfied myself that I understand how the components fit together.

It goes like this: Imagine the unstoppable bullet hits the impenetrable wall.
That's ridiculous you might say. Yes, sure, it is, no doubt about it.
If the bullet is unstoppable it has to go through everything, I mean, by definition, EVERYTHING.
Yes, correct. This is a correct statement, a true proposition, something you can conceive.

If the wall is impenetrable then nothing, I mean NOTHING can go through it.
Again, correct, true etc....

What if the unstoppable bullet hits the impenetrable wall ?
Well its mentally & logically not sensible.
It's non-sense.
Yes. Exactly.

And that is how worry works, exactly like that.
At least it does for me. I mean those long term worry things.

I believe a certain thing, I trust that authority. The unstoppable bullet authority.
I know they are right, they been nice, kind and right about 100's of things.

I also believe things the impenetrable wall authority says.
you get the idea right ?

Each of the parts that make up the worry ball are perfectly sensible and reasonable.
I can imagine an unstoppable bullet.
It's a thing I can get my mind around. Fine.
Same with the impenetrable wall.
The real fun starts once you combine the two. He he he :-)
I get the perfect worry ball. A great recipe.

This kind of example is so simple, so easy to see through, it is is ridiculous.
But some of my worries, especially about decision making, are exactly like that.
I go round and round trying to reconcile things that are NOT and NEVER reconcilable.
The mind, is not almighty.
It cannot solve everything, it can even create unsolvable stuff.

I just have to find the bullet and the wall.
And then I see the conflict, that can theoretically never be solved.


Because the best response to that kind of worry is to say "Bulls***" and walk away. Or you can say other things too.

There are many things to do.

But the problem is: it never looks that obvious. The bullet idea is very persuasive, it might be something I've believed since I was kid, deep deeeeeeeeeeeeeep inside.
And the same for the wall idea...
Voila, we have worry. :-)

The bullet and wall analogy was the clue that unraveled the anatomy of worry for me.

Of course there are lots of other questions i could ask myself
  • What do i really gain by worrying ? I must gain something, there must be some payoff, I must be able to get "off the hook" with something....
  • Do I like the drama ? tension ? pain ? (yes strange as may seem, that is something people can 'like' in way).
Einstein is credited with the saying that:

“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”

Does all this make it easier to stop worrying ?

Don't know, let me see what happens.

In future posts I'll talk about bit more about this. By writing about it here, I get my own mind clear.

- The fonts on this post seem to do strange things, I format them as courier and they come out as something else in different sizes.